Anorgasmia
Anorgasmia
is a female sexual dysfunction that did not receive much attention until
relatively few years ago. Anorgasmia, or the failure/inability of women
to achieve orgasm, was never seen as a problem in the male-focused
culture of the past. The ideal woman of the 1900’s was seen as pure,
asexual, and she was expected to engage in sex only to please her
husband and/or bear him children. Fortunately, forces of social change
such as WWII, and the sexual revolution allowed attention to be
redirected from the woman being seen as the sexually passive wife who
does her "duty" as the acceptor of the gift of life; to seeing
the woman as a fully sexual being who can share in the experience of
pleasure which accompanies a mature sexual relationship.
Researchers such as Alfred Kinsey and Masters and
Johnson both reflected the changing sexual attitudes of the time, and
acted as catalysts for that change. Thanks to the pioneering work of sex
researchers such as these, women who are not able to achieve orgasm no
longer must resign themselves to lives of frustration, depression, and
sexual unfullfillment. Today, a woman who is unhappy about not
experiencing orgasms in her sexual relationship can go to a qualified
sex therapist, be treated in a therapeutic environment, and reasonably
expect that if she wants to be cured she will most likely be able to
achieve orgasm through treatment.
As stated before, anorgasmia is the inability of women
to achieve orgasm, even with adequate stimulation. Use of the word
"inability" in the proceeding definition should be qualified,
however. Although the term anorgasmia includes women who are medically
unable to reach orgasm, the great majority of anorgasmia cases are
caused by psychological, social, cultural, or relationship variables and
are, therefore, best treated in therapy. With this said, women suffering
from any sexual dysfunction, including anorgasmia, should be evaluated
by a gynecologist before delving too far into sex therapy. This article
will focus on the treatment of anorgasmia stemming from psychological,
rather than organic causes.
Anorgasmia is usually categorized or specified in one
of three ways; as primary, secondary, or situational. Primary anorgasmia
means that the diagnosed woman has never been able to achieve orgasm at
any point in her life. A diagnosis of secondary anorgasmia means that
the woman was consistently able to have orgasms at one time, but is no
longer able to achieve them. Situational anorgasmia refers to women who
can achieve orgasm in certain sexual situations, but never orgasm in
other specific situations. For example, a woman who can orgasm through
masturbation but never during sex in the man-on-top position. By now you
may see yourself fitting into one of these categories and you may be
asking yourself, "am I sexually dysfunctional and in need of
immediate psychological care?" The answer is most likely,
"no". Like many sexual dysfunctions, diagnosis of anorgasmia
is somewhat subjective and depends a great deal upon the thoughts,
emotions, and desires of the individual experiencing it. Some women may
never achieve orgasm through intercourse with their partner and yet live
active, fully satisfying sex lives by achieving orgasm in other ways
such as partners stimulation of her clitoris manually. Other women may
be able to achieve orgasm through manual stimulation, yet still feel
depressed, inadequate and unfulfilled because they can not reach orgasm
during intercourse. Studies show that women who identify with the latter
group are not alone. It is estimated that between 10% and 40%of adult
American women have problems achieving orgasms.
Many possible causes for anorgasmia have been
proposed, but all are inconclusive or inadequate at explaining the
problem as a whole. Proposed explanations have included lack of sexual
education, strong religious upbringing, lack of strength in the
woman’s pubococcygeus muscle, past sexual abuse, impotence or early
ejaculation in male partner, and high levels of anxiety associated with
sex. Although some of these explanations have shown a correlation with
anorgasmic women, no one factor has been shown to significantly
contribute to the problem any more than another. Therefore, anorgasmia
is most often treated as a complex combination of many, or all of the
previously listed variables.
Counseling for anorgasmic women will most likely focus
on three areas. First, Women are usually encouraged to attend sex
therapy with their primary sexual partner. There are several reasons for
this, but the primary one is that anorgasmia, like many sexual
dysfunctions, can not be seen solely as the woman’s problem- there are
many relationship variables which effect the symptom and, therefore,
need to be treated in couples therapy. Counseling often begins with an
element of sexual education for the couple. The couple is taught the
mechanisms of sexual arousal in women and, most importantly, they are
taught the differences in the male and female sexual response cycles.
Female inhibited orgasm is often treated with specific
therapeutic techniques. Couples will often be taught to use sensate
focus exercises at home, and females will often be taught and encouraged
to use systematic desensitization, Kegel exercises, and directed
masturbation to treat their orgasm problem. Directed masturbation is a
technique whereby the woman is educated as to how she can bring herself
to orgasm. The hope is that through her increased body-awareness and
comfort with orgasm, the woman can transfer this knowledge and take
charge in directing her partner during intercourse, thereby achieving
orgasm with her partner. Beyond education and techniques, counseling
will likely focus on the emotional or situational factors of both the
individual and the couple that are contributing to the lack of orgasm in
the woman. How these sensitive and all-important issues are dealt with
in therapy will depend a great deal on the theoretical orientation of
each individual counselor.
If the problem of anorgasmia is treated by a qualified
sex therapist who takes time to consider the many variables which can
contribute to the problem, than the couple can expect a positive
outcome. And although successful treatment of this condition depends a
great deal on the specific nature of the diagnosis (primary vs.
secondary, age of woman effected, willingness of partner to attend
counseling, depth of emotional cause, level of anxiety associated with
becoming orgasmic, etc.), research has shown a success rate of 80-90%
for treatment of primary anorgasmia; and between 10-75% success rate for
treatment of secondary anorgasmia. These successful treatment rates are
encouraging for the millions of women who live with the frustration of
not being able to reach orgasm in their sexual lives. It appears that
our society has finally come to the realization that women too are
sexual beings, beings who desire, need, and deserve similar pleasure
from the act of sex as men have enjoyed for centuries. Fortunately, sex
therapists have evolved along with society in their ability to help
women live fully satisfying sex lives if they so desire.
This article courtesy of
The University
of Missouri-Kansas City
by Paul
A. Gore, Ph.D.